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Traits by
Age
Although
each AS
person
exhibits
the same
traits
throughout
their
life, with
age and
experience,
some of
the
characteristics
become
more
“hidden”.
An AS
adult has
learned to
cope with
the
challenges
of AS, and
may
“mask”
some of
the traits
even to
the point
of
“passing
for
normal”
when in
public.
This
section
will give
you a
brief
overview
of what
identifying
personality
traits you
might
expect at
each age.
It is
important
to realize
that every
person is
different;
every
person has
different
traits,
different
strengths,
and
different
weaknesses.
Not every
person
will
exhibit
all the
same
personality
traits,
and in
fact there
may be
some
characteristics
listed
here that
are
totally
missing in
the
particular
ASPIE you
are
thinking
about.
But it is
very
important
that you
treat your
ASPIE with
respect,
love,
support,
as you
would any
person you
meet.
He/she is
an
individual,
and the
“label” of
AS will
not change
that.
In
preschool,
a child
may
hesitate
talking
well
beyond the
normal age
of his/her
peers.
Or he/she
may begin
talking in
complete
sentences
about
complex
issues
well
beyond
what you
would
expect.
These
sentences
will seem
memorized,
and in
reality
they may
be, with
the child
actually
totally
oblivious
of the
meanings
of what
he/she is
saying.
He/she
will be
observed
playing by
himself/herself.
Adults
often say
that the
child “is
in his own
world”.
There may
be a
tendency
for the
child to
rock,
“fidget”,
or even
“flap”
when
concentrating.
Or the
child may
have
unusual
vocalizations
(a certain
word or
words,
hum,
click,
grunt or
the sound
of a
motor)
that occur
frequently
when the
child is
concentrating.
The child
may start
screaming
and
“meltdown”
in a
situation
with many
people
around
(like the
grocery
store, or
parades).
He/she is
unable to
participate
in
“imaginary”
play, but
rather
seems to
review
“scripts”—perhaps
a movie
seen, or a
book read
previously.
He/she may
spend
hours at a
time
lining up
object or
sorting
them—not
really
using them
in the
method
intended.
It has
been noted
by many
parents
there is
difficulty
in toilet
training
an AS
child, and
“accidents”
will occur
at a much
older age
than might
be
expected
(throughout
the
elementary
school
years).
Eye
contact
may be
avoided.
He/she may
seem to
have
unusual
difficulty
in
learning
to dress
himself/herself
(many an
ASPIE
parent has
appreciated
the
invention
of Velcro,
especially
when it
was added
to
shoes).
In regular
school,
the child
does not
seem able
to have
conversations
with his
age-peers—he/she
is more
inclined
to carry
on
monologues,
and
prefers
being with
older or
younger
individuals
(unless
someone
really
listens to
the
conversation,
teachers
and
administrators
may
incorrectly
assume
that the
child is
“social”
because
he/she
talks to
another
child).
Or the
child will
be a
“loner”,
and off to
one corner
of the
playground
all by
himself/herself.
The child
may be
uncoordinated,
and has
difficulty
with any
activity
that
requires
cooperation
between
both hands
simultaneously
(the last
one picked
for team
events).
Fine motor
skills are
slower in
developing.
Handwriting
is
laborious
and
awkward.
Papers are
messy.
The child
seems to
lack
organization—if
the
homework
is done,
it is
“lost”
before it
can be
turned
in. The
extreme
spikes of
interest
are
beginning
to
appear—very
knowledgeable
about one
subject,
and
absolutely
no
interest
at all in
another.
Or they
can study
forever
about one
subject,
and all
the
knowledge
disappears
into an
unknown
“black-hole”
(My son
would
study all
week on
his
spelling
words,
writing
them,
orally
saying
them,
looking at
them, but
come
Friday it
would be
like he
had never
heard of
these
words
ever—and
week after
week he
would fail
each
spelling
test). The
child may
find it
very
difficult
to stay in
his/her
seat for
an
extended
period of
time
because it
is
“uncomfortable”.
In fact
the child
may even
stand and
walk out
of the
classroom
in the
middle of
the
lesson,
causing
the
teachers,
administrators,
and
parents
considerable
concern
(the child
is really
trying to
leave what
they
perceive
as a
stressful
situation,
and does
it the
only way
he/she
knows
how—by
walking
out). The
child may
become
demanding
about type
of
clothing
he/she
will wear
(a certain
color, a
certain
style, or
even a
certain
fabric
content).
It might
even be
necessary
to remove
all tags
from
clothing
for it to
be worn.
The child
may desire
to wear
the same
thing day
after day
after day,
causing
problems
in hygiene
and in
washing
his/her
clothes.
The child
will begin
to adopt
the loud,
high, or
monotone
voice that
is so
identifiable
with AS.
Sleeping
or eating
problems
become
identifiable,
and cause
family
stress.
The stress
of
“holding
it
together”
when at
school may
cause the
child to
come home
and
“meltdown”
at home as
frequently
as daily.
Parents
who do not
understand
AS at this
stage will
begin to
put
additional
pressure
on the
child to
“conform”
to their
expectation,
are in
actuality
cause more
stress,
confusion,
and
frustration
for the
child,
accentuating
the
problems.
As a
teenager,
the lack
of
organization
and spikes
of
interest
continue.
The ASPIE
becomes
the brunt
of jokes
and the
victim of
bullies.
Since the
individual
does not
learn by
watching
others,
he/she
will tend
to be
immature,
and lack
many
socially
required
manners
(e.g.
Tactile
sensitivities
might
cause them
to pick at
scabs or
scratch
their
crotch in
the
classroom
during
High
School).
They begin
to sense
that they
are
“different”
and not
accepted,
but they
have no
understanding
of why and
actually
start
spiraling
into
depression.
Aspies
rarely
date in
High
School
because
even
though the
child may
begin to
see
others
“pairing
off”;
he/she may
have no
idea how
to
initiate
any social
conversation
or
contact.
He/she
wants to
be
“normal”
like
everyone
else but
has no
idea how
to achieve
it.
Homework
can become
a major
stumbling
block –
the AS
student
has no
idea how
to write
down the
assignments,
forgets
textbooks
necessary
for the
lesson,
doesn’t
understand
what
he/she is
supposed
to do, or
if the
homework
is
actually
done,
looses it
or just
does not
turn it
in. The AS
student
may tend
to be a
perfectionist
because
he/she has
been
repeatedly
criticized
—but this
means that
if there
is one
math
problem
that is
not
understand,
the total
page will
not be
turned in.
Homework
will turn
into
battles,
as the
child is
so
stressed
from
school,
he/she
really
needs to
have some
time to
“unwind”
at home in
the
evening
but the
assignments
take more
and more
time,
leaving no
time to
unwind at
all. In
addition,
he/she is
unable to
take
specific
examples
from the
classroom
and
generalize
them and
apply them
in
everyday
life.
Analysis
types of
assignments
are almost
impossible,
as the
executive
functioning
necessary
for this
type of
work is
missing in
an ASPIE.
Team
assignments
are
guaranteed
to drive
an AS
student
crazy—he/she
is unable
to
determine
how to
cooperate
with the
others,
and is
often
ostracized
when
picking
teams
(ending up
with the
“goof-offs”
and
“losers”,
and
thereby
unable to
learn any
beneficial
habits
from those
who really
do know
how to do
the
assignment).
There have
lately
been
several
cases
where an
ASPIE
teenager
has
committed
suicide
because
he/she has
become so
distraught
over life
(thankfully
none of
these
cases have
been
local).
As an
adult, the
individual
has
self-taught
mechanisms
to protect
themselves.
Some
aspies may
have
learned to
lie, while
other
aspies
continue
to be
exceedingly
truthful
throughout
their
life.
The ASPIE
may have
learned to
explode in
rage,
scaring
others
into
submission.
They may
have
learned to
talk in a
loud,
overbearing
monotone,
so that
others
believe
that they
really
know what
they are
talking
about and
let them
have their
way.
They may
just spend
all their
time
talking
about only
their
“favorite
subject”.
When it
comes to
jobs,
either an
AS
individual
has
learned to
go into
something
having to
do with
their
“special
subject”
(like be a
teacher or
a
consultant),
or has
found a
meaningless
job with
repetition,
and with
little
social
contact.
There are
other
aspies
that have
continual
difficulty
with
finding
any sort
of a job,
and end up
in the
unemployment
and
disability
lines most
of their
life. An
AS adult
is
generally
very good
with
objects,
such as
computers
(a
computer
only does
what it is
programmed
to do, so
it is very
predictable).
Some AS
adults
have
successfully
gone into
business
for
themselves,
especially
if there
have
someone to
“help”
with their
weak
areas.
Some
extrovert
AS adults
wish to be
around
people all
the time,
but with
the social
stress
they
self-medicate
and become
addicted
to alcohol
or drugs
(either
legal or
illegal).
The
explosive
rage of an
AS adult,
as well as
the lack
of
understanding
of others,
may lead
to doing
things
they
shouldn’t.
But not
everything
is
negative.
Those with
AS can use
their
special
interest
to make a
financially
rewarding
career.
But the
career
must
be matched
to the
aspies
talents
and
interests
to be
successful.
Aspies are
unusually
creative,
and have
become
known for
special
talents
such as
writing
music,
painting,
inventing,
and yes,
even
writing
computer
programs.
Yes, most
AS adults
have
married
and had
families
and are
living
independent
lives.
There are
many books
and
studies
being done
currently
on AS,
resulting
in
increasing
knowledge
and
understanding.
With
understanding,
it is
easier to
encourage
rather
than
criticize
the AS
individual.
The
opportunities
exist; it
is simply
necessary
to
identify
them.
What is AS
Official
Criteria
for
Asperger
Syndrome
Basic
Characteristics
Traits by
Age
Truth and
AS
Family and
AS
Should You
Seek a
Diagnosis?
Reason and
Support
for BRASS
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"I know of nobody who is purely Autistic or purely neurotypical.
Even God had some Autistic moments, which is why the planets all spin."
~ Jerry Newport